Coming up on my second year of being a Resident Advisor, I thought that I would take note of some of the things that I learned in my first year.
One of the first things that I learned was that I needed to reevaluate what I was doing on campus. My freshman year I had gotten involved in so many clubs on campus that I would often lose track of which ones I was involved in. I knew that rather than spreading myself thin, I would need to better account for my time in a lesser amount of organizations. To this extent, I also didn't work at the library my first semester being an RA, exactly because I wanted to see how my responsibilities would change.
Training
I went in to the job thinking that there would be so many tasks and responsibilities that were calling my name. From what I had observed in others that were in the position before me, there were some that were extremely relaxed about everything and there were others who were in panic mode all the time. How was I going to fall on this spectrum? When we moved in Mid-August, I was expecting training to be a super intense endeavor, but instead, there was a lot of sitting around and just listening, as well as things that we all felt didn't need to be covered so much. There were of course areas of training that we wanted to spend more time on, but that didn't seem to be the case.
There were lots of staffing issues that the department was having in the beginning of the year and I think that had a lot to do with the training issues. One of the Building directors had just been hired and we were almost finished with hiring another building director, along with still searching for a graduate assistant. I think that the training this coming year will be a lot better, especially because we hired an assistant director whose job is to facilitate training.
The First Day
I remember the first day that I met the residents living on my floor. I was one of two RAs on a male floor. We had about 50 people that were living with us, so it was nice having someone else to rely on. We had gathered everyone into one big circle and played a "name game" activity. It was the one where you have to take off your shoe and run in the middle, then back to another shoe, the last person having go next. Everyone was pretty reserved and they all had this "we're too cool to play games like this" look about them! After that game we broke them up into smaller groups where they talked to people in their major. I'm now wondering if that was the best decision, because looking forward in the year they would already form cliques that revolved around their major.
For next year, I think that I will make sure they are in groups where they don't share any common traits with others. Especially the athletes. They have a natural tendency to only associate with other athletes, and I think pushing them to get to know others would be great. I am a firm believer in pushing people out of their comfort zones. Have you ever seen the YouTube channel Yes Theory? I think that an introduction activity similar to their anti-comfort zone videos would be a fantastic thing to break down the comfort-centric mindset I had at least a little bit when I went to university.
I think that the whole experience of university is not primarily about learning. There is understandably base knowledge that we all must have to enter into our careers, but most of us will learn on the job, taught by those above us, or blazing the trail in our own way. The resources that university has are immense, providing some opportunities that some people will never be able to take advantage of again in their lives. University exists to transform the whole person.
Transformation of the whole person is one of my favorite parts of attending the University of Detroit Mercy. Encouraging students to challenge preconceived notions, push up against the status quo to achieve and secure new frontiers for everyone, and to engage the world to enact positive social change are some of the most appealing aspects of university to me.
Anyway, back to the first day. There are lots of things that I want to change about how I did the first day with my residents. One such thing is to welcome each and every one of them with a big hug and "welcome home!" I totally stole this move from Nazareth Farm, the location of last year's immersion trip. I also want to have some balloons in their rooms when they walk in, something to bring happiness and joy to a bleak room that they have yet to populate with who they are. I want to take pictures with all of them, and a big group picture, so that we may always remember the first day that we met, and can post it up in our common room, so that it may no longer be 'common', but that it will be the family room. I also want to have them fill out a 'connection card' so that they can tell me how they think the year will go and what I can do to make their year better.
I think that the whole experience of university is not primarily about learning. There is understandably base knowledge that we all must have to enter into our careers, but most of us will learn on the job, taught by those above us, or blazing the trail in our own way. The resources that university has are immense, providing some opportunities that some people will never be able to take advantage of again in their lives. University exists to transform the whole person.
Transformation of the whole person is one of my favorite parts of attending the University of Detroit Mercy. Encouraging students to challenge preconceived notions, push up against the status quo to achieve and secure new frontiers for everyone, and to engage the world to enact positive social change are some of the most appealing aspects of university to me.
Anyway, back to the first day. There are lots of things that I want to change about how I did the first day with my residents. One such thing is to welcome each and every one of them with a big hug and "welcome home!" I totally stole this move from Nazareth Farm, the location of last year's immersion trip. I also want to have some balloons in their rooms when they walk in, something to bring happiness and joy to a bleak room that they have yet to populate with who they are. I want to take pictures with all of them, and a big group picture, so that we may always remember the first day that we met, and can post it up in our common room, so that it may no longer be 'common', but that it will be the family room. I also want to have them fill out a 'connection card' so that they can tell me how they think the year will go and what I can do to make their year better.
Programs
There were quite a few programs that I ran throughout the year. Below is a presentation that I made highlighting programs from the first half of the year:
I think that the program that I did that surprised me the most was the program that I hosted where we simply watched the documentary 13th. It centers around the problem that America has with Mass Incarceration. I don't know what grabbed everyone's attention, but I had the highest turnout and never even offered food! I was really was encouraged by how many of my residents were there.
Personal Relationships
Trying to make friends with your residents can often be pretty tricky, especially when they see you as someone who exists to enforce the rules and get them in trouble. I've had a couple different times where I would have to write up a resident that I had a pretty close relationship with and that was always a tricky situation because you never know how they are going to react. Some might think that you'll treat them differently because you are friends with them while others simply accept what happens and don't treat you any different after.
I had a few different situations where both of these things happened. I think the funniest occurrences are when there is a big to-do about something that happened in the dorms, but the resident doesn't acknowledge it ever again when they see you afterwards. They act like it never happened and you don't remember it either. The easiest thing to do when this happens is to play along, but to be quick with them if something happens again.
I think a challenge was that the residents themselves weren't sure if, what, and when to report things when they happened. We had a handful of incidents later in the school year where it was known that a resident was causing trouble, but we couldn't do anything about it because there was nothing documented pointing to that resident. If there was it would have been easy to finalize everything that was happening and conclude the investigations into the resident, but because residents were not sure of how they can speak up without others knowing, it took much longer. Letting residents know about dealing with tricky people is something I will have to reinforce this upcoming school year.
Overall, I had great relationships with my residents, and even those that would get in trouble would try to make situations right. It was important to me to let the residents who would get in trouble know that they are not being excluded however, so I would go and eat meals with them and talk to them. No one deserves to be ignored and treated badly, even if they are causing problems.
One of my favorite parts of being a RA was to have residents come to my dorm room. They would often come and ask for advice on school or life and I would simply listen. I would never tell them what to do directly, but I would encourage them to push themselves academically and personally. I always enjoyed later finding out what choice that they actually made. (usually it was a good choice!).
I had a few different situations where both of these things happened. I think the funniest occurrences are when there is a big to-do about something that happened in the dorms, but the resident doesn't acknowledge it ever again when they see you afterwards. They act like it never happened and you don't remember it either. The easiest thing to do when this happens is to play along, but to be quick with them if something happens again.
I think a challenge was that the residents themselves weren't sure if, what, and when to report things when they happened. We had a handful of incidents later in the school year where it was known that a resident was causing trouble, but we couldn't do anything about it because there was nothing documented pointing to that resident. If there was it would have been easy to finalize everything that was happening and conclude the investigations into the resident, but because residents were not sure of how they can speak up without others knowing, it took much longer. Letting residents know about dealing with tricky people is something I will have to reinforce this upcoming school year.
Overall, I had great relationships with my residents, and even those that would get in trouble would try to make situations right. It was important to me to let the residents who would get in trouble know that they are not being excluded however, so I would go and eat meals with them and talk to them. No one deserves to be ignored and treated badly, even if they are causing problems.
One of my favorite parts of being a RA was to have residents come to my dorm room. They would often come and ask for advice on school or life and I would simply listen. I would never tell them what to do directly, but I would encourage them to push themselves academically and personally. I always enjoyed later finding out what choice that they actually made. (usually it was a good choice!).
End Note
I cannot wait until the next school year starts! I've got so many great ideas that I am eager to try out and there is a new programming model that involves community meals and seems to me to be more focused on creating community on our floors.
Here's hoping that it will all go well!
Clay